Sunday 7 April 2013

Wrestlemania 29 Predictions

It's that time of the year, it's time for the showcase of the immortals, the grandest stage of them all, it's Wrestlemania! And I'm really not excited about it this year. It's weird, for the previous Wrestlemania's, there was always something for me to look forward to. This year, not much is attracting me to it, some of which I'll mention in due course, but I suppose in a way it's because of the way the build up is presented, it's just not that good this year. Hell, the final SmackDown before Wrestlemania had TWO matches; Ryback vs Primo and Epico, and Jack Swagger vs Kofi Kingston. Who knows, maybe I'll be surprised, I know one match last year, which was Chris Jericho verses CM Punk surprised me, because I thought that wouldn't be that great, but it ended up being my favourite match of the night.

But enough of that, here are my predictions for Wrestlemania 29.

Wade Barrett vs. The Miz - Intercontinental Championship

Yay the Intercontinental title is on the line again! Or does it count if it's pre-show?

Like the Intercontinental Championship match last, I like both wrestlers here, Barrett when he was leader of the Nexus and the Corre, and the Miz when he was WWE Champion. I think both of them are great athletes and entertainers.

In all fairness, this is actually a tough one to predict. I felt the Miz was being built up for winning the US championship from Antonio Cesaro, which bizarrely didn't happen. At the same time Barrett is currently having a great run as champion.

Wait. Okay, Miz will win. It can go either way, but I think the Miz will win the title.

Alberto Del Rio (With Ricardo Rodriguez) vs Jack Swagger (With Zeb Colter) - World Heavyweight Championship

Yes, it's the World Heavyweight Championship. Yes I'm saying it'll be the first match on the night. What? They did it the last two years, despite the fact that those matches involved the winner of the Royal Rumble. And it's even more bizarre, since the Edge vs Alberto Del Rio match back at Wrestlemania 27 was much better than the WWE title match. Though last years (between Daniel Bryan and Sheamus) was an eighteen second farce.

It's about time Swagger reappeared. He went on a hiatus after going on a losing streak, which must have done some good since I don't think he has lost a match since his return. Unfortunately they've done this anti-multicultural image which is actually quite uncomfortable when you think about it. The story just feels awkward.

For the most part, it's following the same basic principle. Each guy one ups the other, though Swagger does have the upper hand. So with that in mind Del Rio should pick up the victory. The rivalry will most likely continue, but Del Rio will win the first battle.

Tons of Funk & the Funkadactyls vs Team Rhodes Scholars & The Bella Twins

Let's be honest, who actually cares about this match? Okay, the team Tons of Funk, consisting of Brodus Clay and Tensai (Formerly Albert/A-Train) is an interesting team which needs to be developed more. We then have Team Rhodes Scholars, consisting of Cody Rhodes and Damien Sandow, who, admittedly are great athletes, but did say they were breaking up the tag team. Then brought it back for one night only. Then brought it back. We then have the four Divas, the Funkadactyls who have bland personalities, and the Bella's whose gimmick is as old as the wrestling industry.

But let's be honest, this is a low card feud at best, not exactly the sort of match which is put on at Wrestlemania. Seriously, the Intercontinental Championship is a pre-show match but this is put on the show? I would actually like to see Tons of Funk get pushed a lot more, and I don't really see Team Rhode Scholars doing much after this. I think they need to bring back the World Tag Team Championship, give more tag teams something to do. And keep Raw superstars on Raw and SmackDown superstars on SmackDown but we won't be getting that anytime soon.

I would therefore give Tons of Funk the win, but I do feel that for some reason the Funkadactyls will somehow screw this up. So, I'll say Team Rhodes Scholars and the Bella's will come out on top.

Chris Jericho vs Fandango

Oh God Fandango. The dancer who has quickly become one of the most irritating wrestlers in recent years, and he hasn't even wrestled yet, since the guy refuses to compete if people get his name wrong. Enter Jericho, the King of Insults, who also competed on Dancing with the Stars.

I really want Jericho to win, I really do. But the WWE has a knack for newcomers winning their first match. Ryback, Alberto Del Rio, Sheamus, Damien Sandow (As both Sandow and Idol Stevens), Jack Swagger, the Shield, the Miz, and the Nexus included. You have to think really hard to think of someone who lost their debut match in recent years.

But Fandango's debut will be at Wrestlemania? Yeah, Jericho to win.

Team Hell No (Kane and Daniel Bryan) vs Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston (With A.J. Lee) - WWE Tag Team Championship

Speaking of debuts, another superstar will be making his match debut at Wrestlemania, in the shape of Big E Langston. He made his television debut squashing John Cena. That was fun. Since then he has been nothing but an interefer. As a tank who crushes everything in his path. So he's the evil John Cena.

Firstly, I have to talk about Team Hell No. We all knew that partnering Kane and Bryan would net them the Tag Team titles, it's been done before; John Cena and Shawn Michaels/The Miz/Batista/David Otunga (So, Cena and just about anyone), MVP and Matt Hardy, the Power Trip, Rico and Rikishi, and others I'm sure. The thing is, I don't think anyone expected how successful the tag team would be. Making Bryan's "No!" catchphrase even more popular, making "I am the Tag Team Champions!" popular, their anger management segments are hilarious (I actually think they should have won the LOL Slammy award last year), and they do have great chemistry. When they lose the championship (Tag teams always do in the end), I hope they stay as a tag team. WWE always has a team win the titles, then break up a week after they lose them or drift apart without much notice. Primo and Epico are pretty much the only exception in the last few years.

Having not seen Big E Langston in a match, let alone team with Ziggler, I think he's the wildcard in this. He has the potential to dethrone the champions. Ziggler himself has been a tag team champion before with the Spirit Squad, though it was Kenny and Mikey who actually won the titles, he only got the title on his CV due to the freebird rule.

While I might be leaning more towards Langston and Ziggler winning, especially since momentum is going Team Hell No's way, I do think Team Hell No will win. Mainly because I think Ziggler will do something with his Money in the Bank briefcase.

Ryback vs Mark Henry

Hey, a match we all saw coming the second Henry came out to stare at Ryback. Ryback is another superstar who is portrayed as indestructible, having one of the longest undefeated streaks in WWE, which includes defeating more than one opponent at a time, which was ended by CM Punk, with help with the Shield.

Mark Henry is one of those wrestlers who I always thought as underrated. He did have to wait twelve years until he got a world title on his CV, while others like CM Punk, Sheamus, and Brock Lesnar got theirs within a year.

This match is essentially a clash of the titans, and, again it is a difficult match to predict. They are both very similar. In all honesty I would like to see Henry win this and go onto challenging for a World Championship, so I'll give him the nod.

Sheamus, Randy Orton, and the Big Show vs The Shield (Dean Ambrose, Seth Rollins, Roman Reigns)

Oh look, Orton and Sheamus are challenging the Shield to a six man tag match. Again. Exciting. Then again the difference here is that they're teaming with Big Show this time.

The Shield, I have to say, is the most interesting faction since the Nexus. The Corre were good as well but it lacked something the Nexus had. Yet the WWE haven't really done anything interesting with them. Well, except for NXT Wrestling where Seth won the NXT Championship. They've basically done the same rivalry with, essentially, the same people since November, primarily John Cena, Ryback, Sheamus and Randy Orton.

The thing though, is that the Shield is undefeated in six man tag team matches. The only loss came from a singles competition when Seth Rollins lost via disqualification to the Big Show, and that was only so all three members of the Shield would beat him down. Meanwhile, Sheamus, Orton and Show are the 'dysfunctional' team; Orton is the lone wolf, Show is a heel (Though probably a face at this point), and Sheamus doesn't trust his long time foe Big Show at all. Of course, dysfunctional is basically the perfect tag team formula in the wrestling industry.

To be honest, I want the Shield to win. But I feel that they are due a loss.

Triple H (With Shawn Michaels) vs Brock Lesnar (With Paul Heyman) - No Holds Barred, if Triple H loses he must retire

Brock's third match since returning to the WWE since returning in April last year. Kind of stupid right? Of course Triple H hasn't competed since SummerSlam either, primarily because of the broken arm he got in that match. Losing once to John Cena (He's all over the place on here isn't he?) and defeating Triple H at SummerSlam last year, all I can hope is that we see Lesnar compete in more matches after this. Maybe some interesting matches against Mark Henry, CM Punk, Ryback, and Sheamus.

I think it's the stipulation. Triple H already said on air that he was retiring and he was focusing more on the management side of WWE Inc. I'm not sure if he is actually retired or not, but with the limited appearances, I  think he is going towards retirement. So I am leaning more towards Lesnar winning this game so Triple H has an onscreen reason to his retirement, or Triple H will win so he has one final win under his belt. But I'll say Brock Lesnar to win.

The Undertaker vs CM Punk

Undertaker will win. There's no doubt. He will be 21-0. There's no reason why the WWE will tarnish his record.

But the way WWE did this. Okay, I'll go back a bit. CM Punk achieved the longest WWE Championship title reign for the last two decades, holding it for 434 days. The last time there was a longer title reign was Hulk Hogans 1474 days from January 23rd 1984 till February 5th 1988. And the reason why this didn't piss people off like John Cena's 380 day reign, is because the WWE actually took risks with CM Punk, making him a heel and/or vulnerable and beatable.

So when CM Punk's reign finally came to an end, the question is where would he go next. The answer is simple, do what no other has done on twenty occasions; beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania. Now, the other point is, the Undertaker's old manager Paul Bearer, real name William Alvin Moody, died on March 5th. So since the tribute show to him, CM Punk has basically been using Bearer's image to insult Undertaker. I am one of those people that think that the deceased should be left to rest in peace, so continuously insulting Moody and therefore the Undertaker is really bad sport.

This isn't a case of will the Undertaker lose, this is a case of how bad will CM Punk be beaten. But hopefully it'll be a good match, since last year the Undertaker v Triple H and CM Punk v Chris Jericho matches were, I feel, the best two matches on the card.

The Rock vs John Cena - WWE Championship

Once in a lifetime they said. Never again they said. Hell they released a DVD entitled 'Rock vs Cena: Once In A Lifetime'. Well. I suppose it's technically once in a lifetime because, this time, the WWE title is on the line.

You know how I said last year that the Rock vs John Cena became the most over hyped match on the card? This year, it became the most boring. Everyone saw this match coming. John Cena was being pushed for main events again, I suppose it's fair, he hasn't held the WWE title for over one year. The Rock meanwhile was announced months in advanced to be facing the WWE Champion for the title at the Royal Rumble. The second that the Royal Rumble was announced to NOT be the main event, like in every single other Royal Rumble pay-per-view, the second John Cena won said Rumble, we all knew that it would be The Rock verses John Cena at this year's Wrestlemania.

Everyone seems to believe Cena will win, and I can believe that, I think Cena would want a win seeing as how he lost last year. I actually believe Rock will win again, I really want him to win again. Probably because I think Rock winning it would mean more to the WWE Universe. Will Cena be a World Champion again? Yeah. I do think so. Will the WWE take a risk and do something different with his character? God no. Will the Rock win, once again, at Wrestlemania? I certainly hope so.



And those are my predictions. And, actually quite a hard list to predict unlike all the other years. I only got one wrong last year, this year I'll probably get more wrong, it's that tight the matches.

The problem is I don't think it'll be a great Wrestlemania. I hope I'm wrong.

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