Feed (2006)

A long, long time ago, I can still remember how the movies used to make me smile. And then I started watching a certain type of film. Don’t get me wrong, most of the films I get are so bad they’re good, but then there are some which are surprise hits, and others which are just so bad they’re...just bad. I wonder where will the film I’m looking at today end up? And will the fact that I feel like Hell recovering from a cold affect that?

Now, about six or seven years ago when I was in HMV, I came across a film called ‘Feed’. It caught my eye mainly because of the guy on the front cover having a cross tattoo on his back. I then read the back, and was disgusted by what I saw. The next month or so I kept seeing the film whenever I went back into HMV and tried to ignore it. Then I finally thought, ‘I’m going to get it’...and HMV didn’t have it or sold it ever again. After doing the Human Centipede films, I had  to do something that’s similar, so I managed to get ‘Feed’ online.

Plot wise, it’s intriguing. It is an interesting plot that grabs your attention, it pulls you in, it’s attention grabbing. As we start off I got to say, I enjoyed the opening. The film shows us this ordinary guy, Michael Carter (Alex O’Loughlin), driving along casually and singing along with a good tune off the radio. He buys a few big bags of several burger meals, and God forbid after seeing the poster, front cover, DVD case and synopsis, I have no idea why. Then I saw this.

 

...Well, I’m now going on a diet.

While I do know that there are some people who have grown to this size, at least it was either due to disease, or they were lazy, or they liked to eat. This guy has already shown that he has managed to essentially manipulate this woman Deidre (Gabby Millgate) into, not only getting to this size, but to continue eating.

I just want to quickly go over the next scene. We turn up in Germany where our main character, Phillip Jackson (Patrick Thompson), is helping lead an assault on some criminal. My major problem with this scene is that, for some reason, the outdoor shots are tinted blue. For no reason. Seriously, normally when films do this it’s because they want it to look like it shot at night. It’s cheap, but at least most films at least attempt to pass it off as an evening shot. Here, it’s so obviously day, because you can see the sunlight! It’s not even used again. Well, a red filter may have been used for later scenes where it was actually effective, but this tinted blue shot of the outside really bugs me, it’s pointless and stupid.

 

The other thing I noticed in this raid scene is that the acting is half arsed. It isn’t atrocious, well, maybe the guy who was yelling “I want to be eaten!” and the guy who was feeding him...himself were atrocious, but everyone else just seemed to be on par with those from Steven Seagal films. The main character himself reminded me of Stephen Baldwin, that’s not a good thing. I mean, during a sex scene, his girlfriend (Rose Ashton) is actually acting, and he looks completely bored.

Speaking of the sex scene, I wouldn’t mind it, but it keeps cutting back to Carter and Deidre. It’s a bit distracting watching a sex scene and a guy hanging around a woman so fat he needs a crane to lift her.

But in all honesty, the best acting talent this film has, is coming from Gabby Millgate and Alex O’Loughlin. Millgate pulls off a great job as someone who has grown dependant on someone else, who has been manipulated into falling in love with someone who plans to kill her. O’Loughlin meanwhile performs brilliantly. Seriously, I loved watching this guy in every scene, he was perfect.

In fact, O’Loughlin’s character Carter, is a fantastic villain. There, I said it. If I had seen this film, I don’t know, last month I would’ve put him on my ‘Top 11 Movie Villains’ list, probably at number six. He has some great chemistry with Jackson, almost a Sherlock Holmes and James Moriarty style conversation takes place between them. He’s charismatic, he’s intelligent, he’s ruthless, he’s manipulative; he pretty much has the power of persuasion, Hell, by the end of the film I was rooting for him to win! Especially when compared to the main character.

Because believe me, the “hero” of this film is rubbish. And that’s the nice word. Jackson’s so full of himself, and hypocritical. I mean, he starts off wanting to stop Carter for killing people, but the way he does it Carter can get off on a technicality. Let’s see, first of all Jackson has no authority whatsoever as he went to America without permission (Even Carter points this out), he breaks into Carter’s house (He doesn’t even have a warrant), he purchases a gun illegally (Yeah he does, America has a five day waiting period, he gets one in two minutes), he takes Carter’s wife hostage, Hell, he says “fucking” IN A CHURCH, a church for God’s sake (Yeah, I said it online, I can, I’m not in a church!)! And that’s not all, not only does he take Carter’s wife (Sherly Sulaiman) hostage (From the same church I might add), he ties her up in his car despite knowing that she’s ASTHMATIC! And yeah! She does die from an asthma attack!

But wait! There’s more! He has gun pointing at Carter, Carter says he doesn’t have the guts, so Jackson shoots DEIDRE! What the Hell?! That’s now two counts for murder for our so called hero! Then to top it all off, the end shows that he has truly gone down to Carter’s level, and we were supposed to be rooting for this guy?!

 

While the film has its ups and downs, it’s not a bad film. It starts off slow but gradually picks up speed, though I do feel the ending ruined it. The acting, while not great, is made up for by O’Loughlin and the plot is pretty decent. It’s certainly worth a watch.

Wow, the ‘Human Centipede’ films and ‘Feed’, what can I do to follow those?....I know! I know exactly what to review after this!